Felicia

I'm not dead yet...

2006-03-14T21:21:56Z

So I've been sick since the 28th of February. I've had a horrible cough that would get so bad at times that it'd trigger my gag reflex and make me puke. (Beautiful, I know.) Well, I survived...but that following Thursday and Friday, skipped school because I felt too sick and was coughing entirely too much. Well the weekend passed and I went to Shane's, though I still felt miserable and was coughing up my lungs. Monday, I attempted to go to school, but went to the doctor's first. They listened to my lungs, said I sounded fine, and gave me 1000mg of Amoxicillin every 13 hours. Well the next day I still felt horrible and was so fucking weak that I refused to go to school. The same continued for the rest of the week. The cough was just getting worse and worse and was NOT going away. Well Saturday morning I woke up at 7am with my hands and feet swollen to damn near double their size. (Also very attractive, I realize.) I took a shower, thinking it was some allergic reaction because they itched and hurt, and went back to bed. I woke back up at 10am to find them in the same, if not worse, condition. I called my grandma for advice and she said to have my grandpa drive me to the hospital. I did this, was gave some Adapax (sp) and eventually, the swelling went away. While I was there, the doctor (the same doctor who saw me on Monday) heared me cough. He noted that it was the same cough I'd had earlier in the week and even after the medication he perscribed, it didn't go away. I nodded in agreement and he decided to re-check my lungs. Well, this time he heard something and had me taken to have some X-rays done. It was official, something really WAS wrong with me, and they were freaking out. All this nasty white stuff was in my lungs in the X-ray, so they had me have a catscan. Holding my breath was the most troublesome thing ever. -_- but anyway, they injected me with a dye through an IV they had put in after my X-rays (which strangely made my crotch really really warm...O_O --completely off topic) and went through all the catscan stuff. I waited for them to send the catscans to Maryland to get feedback on what was wrong with me. When the information finally came back, everyone was pretty much freaking out. I had Triple Lobe Pneumonia. Nastiness was in both of my lungs, my right lung was pretty much filled, and my left was half. -_- Lovely. They decided to keep me at the hospital.

That's where I've been, the freakin' hospital..from Saturday morning to now Tuesday afternoon. -_- The food was horrible, I lost 3 lbs just from not eating. I had a fever of 101.3 and at nights that would kick in and suck SO much. I hate IVs and I hate the feeling of the liquid going through my veins. I had two different medicines each night. One at 8, the other at 10. The one at 10 burned really bad and made my entire arm and shoulder and some of my side hurt. I was coughing just as bad as home and none of the medicines they were giving me were working, and still don't work. Just...blah, all was bad! I'm home now, they let me out today. My lungs still look really really bad, but my immune system is back up and I'm feeling a lot better physically. I have two medicines in pill form to take. I'm guessing they're suppose to help clear it up. I have a followup in 2 weeks (even though I have an appointment that was previously made on the 17th), and I have more X-rays in 6 weeks.

So yea...I'm alive, though I guess not by much. Supposedly my Pneumonia was really really really bad. *shrug* I blame the stupid doctor for not catching it Monday and letting it progress, but eh *shrug* whatever.

Updated ness...because I know you miss me. =P

2006-02-12T22:33:19Z

Okay, so technically I suck at 'keeping up' with a journal. Bite me. lol. I live in bumfucked Egypt, West Virginia...not enough goes on. (Random: When the FUCK did LJ get a new font form to type with on the update thingie-ma-jig...?) Anyway...Last weekend I went the Shane's. What'd I do this weekend? ...I went to Shane's. lol. I was suppose to go to Adrienne's with Mitchell and Adrienne and KT and Britni and Hanna...buuuuut...I baled. Boredgames and food...verses sex and cuddliness? Pfft! No chance in hell I'd give up going to see Shane again lol.

So SHANE CUT HIS HAIR! This may not be big news to some...but this is like Matt cutting all his hair off to me! In the 4 years I've known Shane, he's ALWAYS had long hair...ALWAYS.

This was how long it was last weekend...

And here's another lovely photo of the two of us (he had his hair tyed back in the picture)

But OH!! The tables turned! TURNED, I SAY!!!!!
Now...he's short haired....and damn so hot. =P

Aaaand in result of his hottness...of course Felicia engaged in lovely activities...

*dance!!!!!!*

Okay...now that I've grossed you all out with my girlie love/lust spells...=P

I made a really sweet...thing...in art class....out of clay....SHUT UP, IT ROCKS!! lol

It was suppose to be of the demon-sort...but it's been called a witch, an old man, a nightmare character...and many many other things. *shrug* Whatever the fuck. It's cool and you can't deny it, damn it! lol.

That shall be all. =)

Whoa is the dying of the hair...

2006-01-29T22:53:40Z

So I dyed my hair. I was tired of the red fading every few weeks, so I decided I'd go back to my natural color for a while, at least until prom was over with and all that. So I went to RiteAid and bought Herbal Essence's Medium Black. Well I love Herbal Essence's hair dye because it's always worked really well and that's the kind I've used with ever color except blonde. Well, before I dyed my hair red this last time in early November, it was blonde because of my Rainbow Brite outfit for Halloween. So when it faded, the red faded REALLY bad and personally, I think it looked horrible. ...Okay that's besides the point. Anyway, I completely forgot about my hair being as light as it was, so the medium brown wouldn't be medium, it would be darker because of having as light of hair as I did. *shakes head* So now, instead of being "medium brown"...my hair might as well be black. -_-

Shane loves it, and most my friends from school say it suits me...but it's taking a while to get use to. I like it in the mirror...but hate it on cam. -_- I dunno. *shrug* I'll have to deal with it either way, but blech..lol.

So some pictures are necessary, of course!

Anyway! Other than that. Friday I went to Hanna's after school, hung out there, looked through a picture album, and drank TEA while watching the Miss America Pageant. Woot woot! hehe. Afterwards, we went to Adrienne's where Mitchell and Britni also showed up and we all played Trivial Persuite: Pop Culture. MUCH fun. My friends are hilarious, I swear lol. I spent the night at Adrienne's where, after people left at 11, Adrienne, her brother, and I watched all the Tourette's Guy episodes, which of course rocked. =P The next day I had to wait until 7pm for mom to pick me up so we slept until around 11, showered and stuff. Her mom cooked all morning to prepare for her sisters, Adrienne's aunt's, birthday. Yay for Yellow cupcakes w/ Chocolate icing. *droolage*. Age dinner and stuff too. Umm...played Yahtzee for the first time. I personally find that game boring as all Hell. Umm..and yea, watched tv. woot woot? lol. Left there w/ mom and went to RiteAid where I managed to buy $70 WORTH OF STUFF!
Batteries
Girlie Pills
Girlie "items"
Jasmine Lotion
HairDye (obviously)
Mascara
Face Powder
Orbit Gum
Face Wash
Toothpaste
Toothbrush
Deoderant
...and maybe more?

lol. It was great. Then also spent around $85 on food at Foodland, but that was necessary...my house was getting BARE! lol. Theeeeeeeen Wednesday of this week I'm going to get my Digicam. Mom is willing to spend $400 on it, so it should be a rather decent one. I'm excited. =) *dance* Yay for spending money!! lol. I'm also trying to get her to buy this $70 contacts for me found here. ...lol okay maybe I'm becoming a bit TOO female...but it's okay, because this is my mother....I'd still never let a guy spend this much on me. =P

Doot doot weeeeee!

To kiss or not to kiss, that is the decision...

2006-01-23T04:19:45Z

So after a rather heated argument (mostly on my part) in VF, I feel the need to vent my opinions on this "SO VERY IMPORTANT" issue here as well.

Damn it, if a guy doesn't want to kiss the girl after they give him head, HE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO!

Okay now logically, one might think that hey, it's his own fluids, it's from himself, she drank it so why can't he taste it, etc. This is all true. I kiss guys after they eat me out. And most of my partners were completely fine with kissing me after I was finished giving them head. But it doesn't matter what OTHERS are okay with or what YOU think is okay...it's what the PARTNER is willing to deal with. And damn it, if he's not willing to kiss you after you've had his cum all over your lips and mouth, then that's damn perfectly fine. It doesn't make him a dick. It's not rude. It's just something he doesn't prefer to do!

Of course after arguing this. I get the "Well she gave him head! The least he can do is kiss her afterwards." Pfft! She gave him head because A. She didn't care to do so and/or B. She liked the satisfaction of making him feel the way he does when doing such an act to him. Maybe she was doing it FOR him...but it was HER decision, in the end, to do it! Just like it's HIS decision to kiss her afterwards or not. No, it doesn't mean he likes her any less. And no, he isn't pushing her away. HE JUST DOESN'T WANT CUM ON HIS LIPS, DAMN IT! Some guys just don't like that shit, deal with it! There's always other ways of affection like kissing the neck or chest or cuddling or going onto him doing things with you...and if those aren't occuring, talk to him about it before sexual encounters the next time so he knows that you want attention...but DON'T tell him that he SHOULD kiss you since you know he DOESN'T WANT TO. No one, in sex, should have to do anything they don't want to. Compromises can always be made. Just because you're a girl and you did the "oh so horrible" activity of giving head DOESN'T mean he should reward you in any way by doing something he doesn't want to do. You gave him head as a gift, as a treat, because he liked it and you knew he would. If you gave someone a birthday gift, would you ask for them to go out and buy you something the next day? Hmph!

Odd mood

2006-01-21T17:54:46Z

If anyone knows me at all, they know me as loud, carefree, somewhat egotistical (ok maybe a bit more than somewhat =P), tomboy-ish, publicly hyper, etc. In all reality, very few things about my personality make me into the steriotypical female. The egotism helps...it's a very female egotism that goes very hand in hand with my flirtatious personality...and the dress code I've adapted to points very much to my growing into becoming a women and freeing myself of this tomboy teen stage...but as for all else...*shrug* I'm really usually kinda "one of the guys." Well, this seems false today.

Today's one of those days that I really do miss hanging with Jenna. Granted, me and her were different on many levels, but when it came down to a lot of our femanine/tomboy personality...we were so very mjuch alike. Both very outgoing and loud and hyper and flirtatious--though in completely different ways. We understood how each other acted and accepted it with open arms. I must admit, I miss that. I very few female friends because, in my eyes, females are slow, weak creatures that are entirely too dramatic for my liking. I obviously have associates of the female persuasion, otherwise I'm sure I'd get pinned with "slut" and "whore" titles...which so far, I've managed to slip away from. But bleh...I dunno...there's times, like today, very seldom times, that I get into these.."funks" and I want to be around girls.

I woke up this morning at 9am, DEFINATELY not a me thing. Even beauties need their beauty sleep. -_- But as I, an hour later, tried to go back to sleep...I failed miserably and watched some horribly chic-flick movie titled Confessions of a Sociopathic Social Climber. I doubt, well..I HOPE..none of the people that would ever read this has ever seen such a movie lol...but it was on Oxygen and I unfortunately got hooked. The movie was dumb, and I won't even go into detailing it...but it was a chic-flick and I somehow became entrapt. I watched the whole damn movie and even related to certain scenes. Horrible. Simply horrible.

So afterwards, I got up, decided I DESPERATELY wanted out of the house, but had no where to go, no way to get there, and no one to go with. -_- Lost cause. So a shower, it was! In the shower, I couldn't help but think "damn...I don't belong here." I tried to persuade myself that all teenagers think that about where they live, and the fact that I lived in West Virginia in the middle of fucking NO WHERE with a graduating class of 74 was NOT that bad....I failed. It IS that bad. I'm a fairly open-minded individual. I honestly think I could survive in New York City, given the right mood and outfit. So what I'm pretty sure I decided, while I sit here still wrapped in a towel, knees against the computer stand and feet in the seat, is that as soon as I escape from this tiny little county...I'm gonna be faced with all these options that I'm sure I'll leap at...and damn it, I might scare myself lol. I know myself more than anyone in the world, and that's how it should be. I'm never confused by a thought in my head, and I'm never unsure about what I'll do in a situation--though lie to others, I may do sometimes. And well...I just know that if I ever come back to my school, heaven forbid, for a 10 year reunion...I'm pretty sure I won't connect to any of them. I may not be some weird New York business women because well...that's a rather dramatic career that I just don't feel like putting up with...but I can guarentee I won't live here, and will more than likely live in or just outside of a major city. I can also guarentee that I would have made it through college and got a damn decent job because along with just my stubborn personality pushing me forward through life, I'm also a damn bright kid.

So now that I've jumbled my whole journal update, I'll go back to some femaninity concepts.
#1.) All girls should dress "nice." And I also think "What Not to Wear" is something everyone should watch.
#2.) Sexual dress and attitude does NOT make you a hoe...it simply makes you more desirable. Very few men ever complain about this, and unless you're a female that cares what other females think...that's all that should matter. It gets your way, and what girl DOESN'T like getting their way?
#3.) There really SHOULD be a gay best friend for every female. And damn it, I hope some day I can find that lol. (I have some gay friends, but eh...not my type of "best friend")

Speaking of best friend.....y'know...I don't have one. 0_o I somehow find that quite strange. I've never really needed one, but...hm...it'd be nice to have one. ...lol..I talk of this as if a best friend is a pet. But anyway...I think I decided long ago that I've never met a person capable of being my best friend. They could befriend me and think the world of me, but I'd never think the same about them...*shrug*...I just can't. I find it difficult to not pick out flaws in people...and for some reason, all the people I know have big flaws instead of little ones, which means as soon as I leave for college or whatever, I'll forget about them and really care less.

Ok...so I realize no one's going to be able to follow this update lol, but oh well. My journal. MINE! ((There's a reason I never made and kept a journal before this -_-.))

Lovely HS!...woot-ness

2006-01-20T03:15:55Z

Being the lovely little almost-18-year-old I am (=P)...I'm finally out of last semester's classes and into the new. =D Yay! Two art classes a day, what could I love more!? 'Course I'm not thrilled that I must remain in both Chorus and Agriculture for the rest of the year, but come on...TWO ART CLASSES! =P There's also an Advanced Anatomy class, but we'll pretend that doesn't exsist...because I'd rather it didn't. =P

and YES I only have 32 more days until I turn 18. =P What'cha gonna do about it, punk!? =P

So the lover hasn't been talking to me lately. Sad, but true. Very difficult to be INVOLVED when one doesn't speak for more than 5 minutes in a two week period. -_- Ick. I just don't know what I'm gonna do with that boy. I like to get attention. I like to be the first on my significant other's mind...and erg, I'm not >.<. Very stressful, I swear!

I think my fave was molested today. 0_o But that's worthy of a whole different journal entry...which will never exsist...

So I was watching a bunch of lower classmen play Halo2 for the last two days. I must admit, I prefer CoD...but that's just me. Anyway, I found that it's not a good idea to be the only girl, especially one with breasticals and large as my own, in a dark room full of geeks. *shakes head* I also discovered that the XBox has controllers with fans built in. I was instantly in love...but I'll never invest in an XBox lol. And lastly, I found that it's difficult to be a cheerleader for someone on Halo because everyone dies, EVERYONE. Rawr. (dont tell me i'm wrong because i'll just kill you...)

I rock your socks and you know it.

LJ has claimed another beauty...=P

2006-01-16T18:04:52Z

Okay so I cracked. I decided to obtain a damned LJ for whatever reason. =P It can't be all that bad though, right? I mean, at the very least I won't update it and *shrug* oh well. =P Buuut, at least I'll have a place to whore my webcam pictures when I get in my lovely camwhore moods...and hey! I'll be getting a digicam soon as well. Ohhh no. =P

<3 me.